7 Signs You Enjoy an Evolved Sex Life

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When it comes to sex and relationships you’ve likely been conditioned with unhealthy beliefs.

Then, you’re tasked with unlearning the misinformation so you can ditch the guilt, shame, and dependence and get straight to authentic connection again. Luckily, when you do, things start to look more like this...

Seven signs you enjoy an evolved sex life:

1. You’re comfortable with eye contact.

Your eyes are the windows to your soul. When you can look directly into his eyes you're comfortable with being seen for who you are. Holding eye contact can be uncomfortable at first but it’s a practice that opens you up to a deeper level of trust and pleasure than before.

2. Orgasm is not the goal.
 
You don’t let the end determine the whole experience. You let it unfold. You aim to be present. If he comes too soon, or you don’t come at all, you’re not routinely disappointed. 

3. Crying is acceptable.

Crying is a sign of vulnerability. Sex can touch you so deeply that an emotional release is inevitable. When this release happens you surrender to it. It’s healthy to let emotions flow through you. It’s not healthy to hold onto them. 

4. You’re uninhibited. 

When you don’t worry what your partner thinks you can fully enjoy sex. You are present. You know how to get out of your own way and let yourself go

5. You go slow.

You understand that sometimes moving less means feeling more. You aim to take your time. Hollywood glorifies the fast paced sex scene but they’ve missed the mark and distorted our expectations in the process. 

6. Orgasm and Ejaculation can be Separate Events.
 
For the men: holding your seed (not coming) is not necessary 100% of the time but it’s sooo important to understand. Consistent ejaculation can negatively impact your energy levels and health. Semen is concentrated life-force energy. When you discover orgasm beyond ejaculation it's a game-changer that has benefits far beyond better sex.

7. You Communicate.

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You’re not afraid to speak up. You don’t expect your partner to just get you or your body. You are comfortable with letting your walls down and showing him how you like to be touched. This communication is reciprocated. 

Let us know in the comments below:

Which one of these changed your sex life the most?

For me #1 was huge. I had a boyfriend who I could n e v e r make eye contact with. I was self-conscious and afraid of being seen. I had a mega personal breakthrough when I was able to truly see myself and my partner without judgement or criticism. 

Love,

Jillian Xx

 

WANT MORE?

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  • get instant insight on doing work and motherhood on your own terms 

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After the Baby: 5 Ways to Reclaim Your Sex Life and Reconnect with Your Partner

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Your body stretched and birthed, you evolved into a new mother, and your relationship shifted into unknown territory. You and your partner are the foundation for your family’s well-being. A strong foundation that allows you to thrive is built on good communication. 

Communication is key or misunderstandings will start to creep in.

Sex is the best communication. It’s non verbal. It brings your relationship to that telepathic level again. You can work your problems out in bed. Or on the floor. You can forgive, let go, and grow together. 

It’s about coming back to one another despite the changes and challenges you face. When your sex life is alive so is your relationship. Plus, great sex makes you a superhuman. 

Courtesy of a new mother who has been there herself here are five ways you can reconnect with your partner and ignite your sex life again. 

1. Go f*** yourself. 

If you don’t feel sexy, valuable, and turned on then you can’t expect him to be turned on either. Your partner can feel your vibe. What messages are you sending with your words, actions, and body language? 

Decide what you want and be clear. In the meantime, go f*** yourself so you can be satisfied without needing his presence.  

2. Make the Time.

Set time aside for sex. No phones. No distractions. One of my favorite women, Marie Forleo, recently said to me, “If it’s not scheduled, it’s not real.” 

You've got to put alone time on the calendar otherwise you’ll be busy and sex will make an entrance into your life way less than it should. 

3. Get a sitter.

Imagine this: right as you’re about to hit your personal orgasm glass ceiling your son wakes up crying. Don’t feel guilty about asking your sister, mom, or friend to watch your little one so you can enjoy uninterrupted time together. Make it important, make it a priority. Time spent with your partner is time invested wisely.  

4. Get in his shoes.

You want him to understand how hard it is to be a mom all day long without losing your mind, patience, or car keys. You’re responsible for a little person now. You don’t get a salary and  you’re expected to show up with everything you've got. How about a little recognition, please? 

If you want to keep your relationship alive you've got to kick this thought pattern to the curb. You’re in this together. Open your eyes to the sacrifices he makes. What are his strengths and talents? Compliment him on the regular. Treat him how you want to be treated.

5. Feel Satisfied in Advance.

The emotions you send out into the cosmos are returned to you tenfold. This is why things can go from bad to worse or they’re good and keep getting better.

Create situations where you can genuinely feel turned on and excited by your life. Don’t wait for someone else to deliver the circumstances you need to feel good. 

What can you do today to feel the way you want to feel? Put on a dress instead of those yoga pants. Look in the mirror love what you see. Get yourself some brand new undies. Have fun with it.

I’d love to hear from you: What’s one thing that helped you reconnect with your partner and amp up your sex life after you became a new mom? If you liked this post please share it with all your new mama friends and be sure to subscribe to free email updates here.

Big Love,
Jillian Xx

 

 


WANT MORE?

Go From Overwhelmed to On-Point with Your Purpose Work with the Deeply Supported Mother Workbook

deeply-supported-mother-workbook

If you want to:

  • identify what needs to come off your plate NOW

  • map (and start to magnetize) your ideal support system with one of my favorite exercises (SO YOU CAN SHIFT INTO TRULY THRIVING)

  • get instant insight on doing work and motherhood on your own terms 

  • take the next-level action steps you’ve been avoiding

Then, this is for you. Download it below for instant access.