Conscious Parenting + Healing Your Lineage with Tamara Iglesias of Welly Nest [A Special Guest Video Interview]

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Holy wow! I recently had the opportunity to sit down and talk directly with Tamara Iglesias of Welly Nest on the subject of Conscious Parenting and Motherhood and let me tell you: this woman is a true powerhouse. 



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Tamara Iglesias is the Founder of Wellynest, a conscious parenting company, dedicated to raising whole beings from the very beginning. Coaching mothers and fathers alike, Tamara helps empower families to live happy and nourished lives.

Tamara’s mission is to shift the way we raise our children by bringing the awareness of self into the parenting journey. As parents, when we heal ourselves, we can heal our children and ultimately heal the world. Consciously parenting from a place of respect, cultivating deep trust and creating healthy boundaries is essential. When parents are supported on their own healing journey as well as supported and inspired to use conscious words, act with intention and slow down to spend quality time, children can development into fully-realized, emotionally healthy adults, allowing the entire family to thrive.

I was introduced to Tamara through a friend, Jana Roemer, and knew immediately I wanted to connect with her, and share her wisdom with you.

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In the following special guest video interview with Tamara you will hear an insightful conversation about what it means to parent with consciousness (hint: it has more to do with YOUR healing than anything else).

This conversation is for you whether you’re already a parent, or planning on becoming a parent in the future.


We cover:

+ How parenting can be easy (I know, I know — you just need to listen)

+ How Tamara got started on her Conscious Parenting Coach journey

+ Parenting as our greatest opportunity to EVOLVE

+ Children as mirrors / deepest reflections of us

+ Maternal lineage healing through conscious parenting

+ “It’s not fair I don’t want to do this work” vs. “What a gift that I get to do this for my lineage”.

And so much more! Watch the full video below:

To learn more about Tamara Iglesias and her work over at Welly Nest, use the links below:

Welly Nest on Instagram

Welly Nest Website

Tamara’s 8 Week Virtual Conscious Parenting Course (with LIVE Coaching).

And if you liked this video interview, be sure to let Tamara and I know that you tuned in, by tagging us on Instagram, and sharing this with a Soul-Sister who might need to hear it.

Big Love,

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WANT MORE?

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If you want to:

  • identify what needs to come off your plate NOW

  • map (and start to magnetize) your ideal support system with one of my favorite exercises (SO YOU CAN SHIFT INTO TRULY THRIVING)

  • get instant insight on doing work and motherhood on your own terms 

  • take the next-level action steps you’ve been avoiding

Then, this is for you. Download it below for instant access. 

 
 
 

Am I the Mother I Want to Be? Sometimes, I Am Her.

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I remember sitting at a table with two friends last year, when one of them (who was not yet a mama) said something along the lines of, “I know I’m not ready for a child. I don’t want to pass my unconsciousness down the line.”

In my mind, my honest response was, “good luck with that!”

Maybe I was quick to respond because of my own experience. I mean, even after my awakening in 2011, I still struggle with guilt about the way I sometimes fail my son (who is now 5).

You can only do so much ancestral healing work from OUTSIDE the ring.

As in: you can prepare as much as you want before you become a mother, but once you’re a mother (or parent) — the real work begins.

That’s my opinion.

Maybe, like me, you’ll say to yourself, “Holy sh*t, I thought I had healed this.”

There have been dark moments (usually when I’m not taking care of myself/my energy or devoting time to my purpose-work) where I have grabbed my five year old by the shoulders, shaken him, and yelled in his face. Not for no reason, mind you, but because I could no longer tolerate his behavior and non-compliance (which I understand is a glaring reflection of ME).

There have been other things. Like the times when I have made him responsible for the negative shift in energy during the day, or in the house, or between us. Or the times when I have dragged him kicking and screaming to the yard and left him out there until I could get calm enough to handle it.

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Or the times I have outright asked him, “What’s wrong with you?” — all the while knowing how damaging that statement is, and that there is truly nothing wrong with him, but that it’s ME and his behavior or a situation that needs to be addressed with consciousness.

There have also been really sad times when I have completely shut myself and my heart down, and been conditional with my love — a pattern I no doubt lived on the receiving end of as a daughter of an unfit mother.

I won’t go into a long defensive explanation about how freaking persistent, intense, and energetically demanding he is. But I will say: he wants to make ALL the rules, he does not comply, and parenting him is NOT easy.

I’ve invested in therapy. I’ve been doing EFT and EMDR. I’ve read Dr. Shefali. And Peaceful Parent, Happy Child. I’ve read the books about the Spirited Children. I’ve talked to other moms who get it. I’ve talked to moms who don’t.

And I’ve given my child more space to exist as who he naturally is than so many I see fitting their children into tidy little boxes of what’s acceptable — viewing them not as unique beings, but rather as extensions of themselves.

And despite all of it, I still get it wrong, more often than I want to.

Is there more I could do? Yes.

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Am I the mother I want to be? Sometimes I am her.

Sometimes, I lean right into her and I’m proud and relieved. In the moments where I remember to shift the energy intelligently — I am her. In the moments when I maintain eye contact and can hold my role as the energetic container for his intensity — I am her.

When I remember to laugh at it all, that he chose me, and that he IS going to grow into a wonderful and emotionally intelligent young man — I am her.

It’s vulnerable for me to share my dark mom moments, because I know conceptually what the right and wrong (or unconscious) ways mothering/parenting are — meanwhile, my LIVED experience of being mothered is one of consistent abuse.

I’m sitting here right now, as I write this, thinking of a woman I can send this to, to read before I hit publish. Maybe she’ll tell me not to share it, or maybe she’ll say, ‘me too’ — that she also has dark mom moments that are hard to talk about.

One thing is for certain: I know that I am human. I know that I am not alone on the journey. I know that I came, not to be perfect — but to heal — to carry the torch forward for my Soul family and lineage one step at a time, even if that means that the steps I take don’t get us fully to the destination I know is available.

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In my mind I can hear one of my friends quote Matt Kahn. In moments of admitting my faults and sharing my pain, she’d remind me, “you know Jillian, Matt Kahn would say that in the dark moments, ‘you deserve more love, not less.’”

Is it time to hold yourself with the Love and compassion that you know will wash your Spirit clean and clear? Is it time to forgive yourself for your mistakes and move forward? Is it time to love yourself unconditionally, as if you were the child who needed to be held?

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You’re not here to be perfect. You’re here to be human. And the more you can allow for your mistakes the easier you’ll move through them, learn from them, and the more quickly you will discover another way — a better way — a more aligned way for you + yours. .

Loving You,

Jillian Xx

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On the days that I rise early and do my writing, I am far more satisfied, contented, and pleased — and it makes me a way better mom!

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Big Love,

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WANT MORE?

Go From Overwhelmed to On-Point with Your Purpose Work with the Deeply Supported Mother Workbook

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If you want to:

  • identify what needs to come off your plate NOW

  • map (and start to magnetize) your ideal support system with one of my favorite exercises (SO YOU CAN SHIFT INTO TRULY THRIVING)

  • get instant insight on doing work and motherhood on your own terms 

  • take the next-level action steps you’ve been avoiding

Then, this is for you. Download it below for instant access. 

 
 
 

True Forgiveness: What My Gallbladder Taught Me About Healing the Mother-Wound

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Just a few weeks ago the curtain was pulled back on a pain I didn't know I still carried.

It started at a conference in Philadelphia. I thought I was there to study the authors + speakers. I wanted to know how it worked — the industry. What does it really take to be a speaker? What were their talks like? How'd they open them? Would I have to tell jokes when it was my turn to take the stage? 

I should know by now, that what I think I need is always a thread that leads me to something deeper. Source had other plans for me — healing plans

At one point in Kyle Gray's workshop, he said, "When a client wants to manifest something but isn't seeing the results, I ask them, 'who do you need to forgive?' His words struck me like an arrow to my belly. I still had to forgive her.

I sat in the audience and peacefully thought about my mom — about the pain, followed by the healing, followed by the pain, and about the line in the sand that I had drawn last year to protect myself from getting hurt again. That line, I thought, was a healthy boundary that I required to flourish.

That line, I thought, was my liberation. Because before I drew that line, a part of me was on the fence — waiting to witness her healing miracle.  

I started to live for me, wholeheartedly, after I drew that line. 

I let her know where I stood. Don't call. Don't text. Don't arrive uninvited. I'll be over here, and you'll be over there — separation. 

I didn't want to be one of those women who waited until their mother died to start living. So, I did what any wounded daughter might do and decided the relationship could die now, instead. 

Am I intense? Sure as water over rock with ten million year's time. Am I dramatic? You should see me stub my toe, or drop a cupcake face down on the kitchen floor. 

I'm not new to healing. I've sat in the red tent with Bethany Webster, a thought-leader on healing the mother-wound, and I've heard her say that for some daughters estrangement from an abusive parent is the only way to know true freedom. I've called on every archangel, rested my body on white tables, been beneath healing hands — for Reiki, acupuncture, and maya abdominal massage.

I've journeyed to the center of my personal earth. I've sat with the existential pain, and dawned into it's power. I've traveled to the jungle, and to the health food store. I've googled it. Eaten it. Integrated it. Danced with it, chanted it. I've looked myself in the mirror and witnessed utter beauty and total acceptance. I've married myself, on multiple occasions. I've wept, and screamed, and seen from the Eagle's point of view. 

I've cleared my womb with obsidian. I've sent grace and healing to all the women who have come before me and all those who'll come after. I've taken it all off, prayed with the herbs, and walked into the fire of Kali's eyes. 

I've self-examined like my life depended on it, because it did. 

I thought I had forgiven her for that time at Christmas dinner, when she told the table that I was an ungrateful b*tch, and moaned like the victim of her terrible life — her usual crawl for the love she couldn't feel from within.

Or that time she told me that my newborn son was 'not the messiah,' in response to me being the nurturer she never was.  

I thought I had forgiven her for the shaming, the abuse, the betrayal, and the fault-assigning.

I thought I had forgiven her for manipulating me with her money, for dangling  promises before me, and then for snatching them away as I was upon them. I thought I had forgiven her, untangled from her, cut myself free of her sticky black fingers. 

I thought I had forgiven her and her trespasses — they were trespasses, weren't they? I thought I had done the work on my meditation cushion. I thought that the time I spent surrounding her in healing Light was enough.

I thought I was done. I thought I was free. I thought I saw her as me. 

I decided, if she was a friend of mine, not tied to me by blood, I would have stopped giving her my energy long ago. I would have cut her off, declared her toxic. And so I did — I quickly and quietly disrobed myself of door mat status.

I thought I had forgiven her. But I was mistaken. I thought I had made those boundaries from a place of self-respect, but they were derived of ego and bitterness. They were drawn from the ashes of unspoken anger.

I see now that forgiveness works like this: there is no past. It never happened. None of it.

Love is like that, you know. It sees nothing but now.  

When I arrived home from the conference,  I found myself contorting on the bedroom floor, overtaken by pain like a knife to my stomach and spine. It consumed me as I rolled and twisted to the sound of my son crying nearby.

I called upon my higher self, and demanded to know the reason for this pain, for it wasn't the first time that it had crippled me, though it was by far the worst.

I first pleaded: Why, Why, Why? Recognizing that this plea was not strong enough, I quickly decided to demand answers. What is this pain, I demand to know! Show me how to heal!

After the pain subsided, I stood up — lighter than air, and I knew immediately with crystal clarity that I had just experienced a gall-bladder attack, that it was the result of residual bitterness + pride, and of not fully forgiving my mom. Time to release it all with love. I put on a white dress, and took my son for a walk. It was a holy twenty minute ordeal that revealed to me the next steps on my path. 

Your pain is potent medicine.

Let go. Soften into it. 

For my healing-wisdom seekers:

"If you repress anger, hold it in, and never express it, it will eventually hurt the liver/gallbladder and cause imbalance which will lead to disease." — Emma Suttie D.Ac, AP

In this moment I can remember something sage that Bethany Webster said in her mother-wound workshop. She said,

"Forgiveness is a by-product of your own transformation." 

And So It Is.

In Love + Vulnerability,

 

Jillian Xx

For more information on the gallbladder's emotional/energetic correlations I recommend the following articles:

Chinese Medicine Living: Healing the Gallbladder with Chinese Medicine

Gallbladder Emotions + Personal Development


Make Space for What Matters: 1x1 Obsidian Womb Clearing Package. Learn More Here.


WANT MORE?

Go From Overwhelmed to On-Point with Your Purpose Work with the Deeply Supported Mother Workbook

deeply-supported-mother-workbook

If you want to:

  • identify what needs to come off your plate NOW

  • map (and start to magnetize) your ideal support system with one of my favorite exercises (SO YOU CAN SHIFT INTO TRULY THRIVING)

  • get instant insight on doing work and motherhood on your own terms 

  • take the next-level action steps you’ve been avoiding

Then, this is for you. Download it below for instant access.