How to Birth and Heal Like a Boss (Before You're Even Pregnant)

After my son was born at home, I was on fire with the power of the female experience, and started writing a book, Trust Your Body, Trust Your Birth.

In the beginning of the writing process, I heard Australian Midwife, Jane Hardwicke Collings say, "What you learn at the altar of menstruation is what you bring to the altar of childbirth."

A light bulb went off in my heart and I stopped writing that book. My work with women required a course correction. 

If I was to help women make empowered decisions that included navigating birth in a crumbling patriarchal system, we would have to time-travel back to early experiences of menstruation and sexuality, before birth was imminent. 

Menarche, a woman's first period, is a Rite of Passage that is widely overlooked and stripped of spiritual and cultural significance in industrial society. The sacred mystery of your blood (and life itself) could have been celebrated and revered more.

It is the same for birth. Mother's are often celebrated with a shower of things for baby, and not for the experience of transitioning from Maiden to Mother. 

After my light bulb moment, instead of writing articles about how to navigate birth and new motherhood, I began to unearth the relationship that women have to being women.

Being a woman includes having a cyclical nature, waxing and waning cycles of introspection and extroversion, a fluctuation of sexual energy, creativity, and a flow of life that only women truly know.

What does all of this have to do with birthing and healing like a boss?

Reconnecting with your body, your cycle, and your sexual energy will set you up for empowered birth, motherhood, and deeply satisfying relationships, too. 

I teach women how to reconnect with their pelvic space through the Taoist Jade Egg Practice. It's a practice I'd like to see in the hands of every woman. If you're not familiar with what a Jade Egg Practice is yet, check this article out. 

Starting a Jade practice before you walk through Birth + Motherhood is powerful medicine for what's to come.

It will help you tap into areas of your Yoni (vagina) that may be inactive, release energetic patterns from your womb, and prepare you for the physiological aspects of childbirth and postpartum.

Working with your jade can also awaken deeper levels of pleasure for you (enjoy delicious orgasms with ease). Which reminds me, have you read birth advocate Angela Gallo's article on the benefits of Self-Pleasure during labor yet? 

Here Are Three Reasons a Jade Egg Practice Will Help You Birth + Heal Like a Boss (Before You're Even Pregnant):

1. Know Your Body Better

There is nothing more empowering than a woman who knows her body very intimately.

There is an initiation that's been missing from our lineage for too long. In the west, young women are misled to seek understanding of their body through experiences with others. I believe women need to be consciously guided into the self-exploration of their own body, which includes self-pleasure.

You need to know your body well enough to say 'NO' to the ob/gyn when he or she suggests something that may not be necessary for you. You need to know your body well enough to ask for more time before induction. You need to know your body well enough to seek out birth workers that will honor your voice and your needs first.

Your body is your body, is your body. Know it well. This will serve you in every situation. Get to know your body, more specifically your Yoni, before you're a birthing woman.

2. How to Breathe, Relax, + Open Your Pelvis

A Jade practice involves a deep awareness of your pelvic bowl. To insert your jade egg, you bring your attention to your pelvic floor, relax your vaginal opening, and take her in.

Then, to move your jade egg up toward your cervix , you engage your pelvic floor muscles (aka squeeze — like a kegel). To access the full description of this exercise download your free e-book here. 

Then, when you're done with your practice, squat down to release your egg by opening your Yoni (vagina). Once you feel open, actively push your egg out into your hands.

Breath, Surrender, Open, Push. Sound like birth?

A strong, yet supple, pelvic floor changes the experience labor and birth. It can also dramatically reduce the length of labor, and help shift you from pain to pleasure.

3. Postpartum Healing + Restoration

The jade egg is the missing element in every woman's birth kit.

Postpartum care is undergoing a massive revolution at the hands of the mothers and birth workers who know more attention and reverence is needed at this time of integration.

Yes, it will take time for you to restore your mineral supplies, regain pelvic strength, and integrate the physical changes you've experienced, and the jade practice can help to speed your energetic and physical healing.

When the pelvic floor is weak, vital energy, or 'chi' is not contained in the abdominal-pelvic cavity, thereby limiting the energy available for optimal organ functioning.

A strong pelvic floor provides a solid foundation for the containment and circulation of chi throughout the body.

Postpartum healing through the jade practice can occur on an energetic level, helping to move trapped birth energy out of the pelvis that became stuck due to an unexpected cesarean or another trauma.

And the jade healing is always working on a physical level — to strengthen and tone the muscles of the pelvic floor. 

In indigenous populations where the wisdom traditions have been preserved, women know that the womb requires three years minimum to be restored before subsequent pregnancy.

Entering your second pregnancy without a strong pelvic floor + restored womb is not wise according to these traditions. 

My good friend + amazing Doula, Lacey Broussard, has a generous blog series up on optimal fetal positioning that will enlighten you to just how important it is that your body is strong and well aligned prior to birth. Check it out here.

As always, here's to your life, at full-power. You're the boss goddess. And I love you.

If you found this post helpful + informative, share it with your sisters! 

Big Love,
Jillian Xx

As a writer and women's health mentor, Jillian fuses her background in yoga, bodywork, and spiritual healing, to give women the tools they need to step into full power. She believes that pleasure is potent medicine and that sexual energy can be redirected for healing and vitality.

As a writer and women's health mentor, Jillian fuses her background in yoga, bodywork, and spiritual healing, to give women the tools they need to step into full power. She believes that pleasure is potent medicine and that sexual energy can be redirected for healing and vitality.

View our current selection of Jade + Yoni Eggs to see a list of each stone's healing properties.

Want to go deeper? If you're looking to transcend self-imposed limitations through womb clearing,  learn more here. 

Want to go deeper? If you're looking to transcend self-imposed limitations through womb clearing, learn more here. 


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If you want to:

+ Help your clients get better results

+ Free up time + energy to strategically create a group program

+ Stop hustling for your next single 1:1 session, or low-end sale

+ learn how to go high-end with your rates, effectively

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Be Your Own Sacred Anatomy Expert: 12 Facts You Need to Know About Your Womb

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Understanding your sacred body on the deepest level puts you in a position to be a great teacher and luminary.

There's a 98% chance you didn't learn most of the following facts as a young woman. And if you did, consider yourself on the leading edge. 

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12 Empowering Facts Every Woman Should Know About Her Womb + Body: 

1. It Creates and Destroys.

Your womb is the center of your creative energy. During the time that you're approaching ovulation you will feel more social and turned on. At this time, you are energetically preparing to be penetrated by life itself.

After ovulation, you recede into darkness like the waning moon, into a time of introspection. It's here that you will crave more solitude as you traverse 'the dark side' just before entering menstruation.

Ovulation: You create. Energy builds.
Menstruation: You destroy. Energy Releases.

This rhythm is essential to understanding menstruation as spiritual practice.

When you align your mind and heart with the natural rhythm of your biology you facilitate spiritual growth and understanding.

2. You Respond to the Moon.

As a human, comprised of over 80% water, you are intimately linked to the ebb and flow of the lunar cycles (and to the larger movements of cosmic order).

The sacral chakra specifically, is a yin center, that governs the fluids, hormones, and reproductive system of your body.

3. It's Mega Strong.

It's a multi-layered, super-powered muscle and it's the strongest of 'em all.

During birth the uterus has got a wild job to facilitate. For nine months, or ten moons, the womb expands to house a growing human. Then, during an incredible culmination she rhythmically surges, relaxes, and pushes a new human out.

These surges are autonomous, meaning the mother does not have to direct her uterus with her mind, much like we don't have to consciously direct our heart beat. 

4. It Can be in the Wrong Place.

"When a woman's uterus is out of balance, so is her life." - Don Elijio, Maya Shaman 

The uterus has eight ligaments that keep it in it's optimal position not including the ligaments that separately support the ovaries. These ligaments are prone to shortening and lengthening because the womb itself is designed to expand and move.

And just like any other ligaments in the body they can become strained through injury and cause the uterus to move into misalignment. The longer she stays misaligned, the harder it is to get her back to center.

Wise woman tip: When you are menstruating don't do any heavy lifting. The ligaments are flexible and susceptible to misalignment at this time.

Most OB/GYNs are not aware that correcting the misalignment is crucial for a woman's health. And most aren't trained in the hands-on techniques that can realign her. If you think you may have a misaligned uterus I highly recommend seeking a maya abdominal massage practitioner here. 

5. Gravity Brings Her Down.

Although, it doesn't have to if you keep active and keep your pelvic floor strong. Squats, frequent walking/movement, and practicing exercises with your jade egg will help you to keep your womb lifted and central.

6. It Swells During Menstruation. 

Take one look at the photo below and you'll know why your body wants to slow down when you are bleeding. Your uterus gets BIG. An enlarged menstruating uterus, if misaligned, can press upon the descending colon, or the bladder, or in other directions.

Wise Woman Tip: Start a moon-time journal. Write down what phase the moon is in on the first day of your bleed. Then, note where you feel pain when menstruating and monitor this pain to see if it changes from month to month. 

7. It's Yours Before All Else.

Your body, your choice. A well-meaning physician might want to induce you during pregnancy, or prescribe you birth control to help you with your skin, or possibly suggest a hysterectomy.

Remember, you get to step back from any outside suggestion to check in with yourself, first. This is about learning to trust your instincts and your body as an intelligent and divinely-designed vessel. 

8. Prolapse is Real. 

I had never heard of uterine prolapse until I studied with the Arvigo Institute, likely because I was in my early twenties and the sex education I had received in school was archaic.

Prolapse is when the uterus starts to lower down into the vaginal canal. It's often the result of weak pelvic floor muscles, gravity, a difficult birth, or unresolved trauma. You can actively prevent prolapse by starting a jade egg practice and keeping your pelvic floor strong.

9. A Hysterectomy is Not 'Bad'.

Yes, removing your physical uterus can be ultra traumatic if you're not ready and haven't exhausted other options. But it's important to know that deciding to remove your uterus is not good or bad, it just is.

Your womb is an energetic space that can never be taken from you. 

10. It Carries Karma.

Your womb stores information on an energetic level that has been passed down ancestrally from womb to womb. This is what we call the Mother-line. 

It's no mistake that your mother is yours. You stand at the precise place in the mother-line so that you can bring the next level of healing to yourself, your ancestors, and to this planet.

11. Inversions During Menstruation Will Prolong Your Period.

When we bleed, there is a down and outward energy at work in the body. It is wise to work with this energy, rather than resist. 

If you want to assist your body, and possibly shorten the time you bleed, avoid inversions while menstruating (any posture where your pelvis is above your head). 

12. Blood is an Indicator. 

The color and consistency of your blood is an important indicator of your health. Ideally, you want to see bright red blood at the beginning of each cycle all the way through to the end.

Womb Love + Thank you so much!

I hope you enjoyed this list + found it enriching! I'd be super appreciative if you'd share it with your sister-goddess-friends. Knowledge is power, yes, but only when we're confident in ourselves. Here's to more women, knowing and honoring their sacred bodies.

Big Love, 

Jillian Xx

 

 


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If you want to:

+ Help your clients get better results

+ Free up time + energy to strategically create a group program

+ Stop hustling for your next single 1:1 session, or low-end sale

+ learn how to go high-end with your rates, effectively

Then, this is for you. Download it below for instant access. 

 
 
 

Get Good at Receiving: How to Tap Into Your Feminine Essence for More Ease, Abundance, and Pleasure

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I'll never forget the sex advice my mother gave me when I was fifteen. As she sped up the road toward our driveway she said through a mischievous half-smile: "Whatever you do, don't just lay there." 

I didn't realize it then, but that advice was not about me, it was about her. 

It was a combination of her passing on the patriarchy's conditioning that girls should appeal to the opposite sex, and of her own lack of self-worth. I was already having sex at that time, but I didn't dare tell her.

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And you know what? I remembered what she said. I didn't just lay there. I made it good.

I pleased my partners, sure. But I never showed my heart. It never occurred to me that pleasure was for me too. I rarely had an orgasm. I was never cracked open at the core. I never cried during sex either, not then. 

Had that sex advice been about me, and not about how desirable my mom wanted to project that she was, it could have gone something like this: "Your body is sacred, and sex is something beautiful that's shared between two people in love. Sex without love isn't worth it. And sex is not just for your partner, it's for you too. Also, be safe, because sex is the energy that creates life, and if you're not ready to be a mother, you need to understand your cycle and other ways to prevent pregnancy."

But that's not the advice I got. And that's not the advice most of us receive in our youth.

I needed to 'prove my worth' and be 'good enough' in bed to keep a man content and pleased with me. Sex was about making him happy and making him want me, despite the feeling that this was all a trick, and that deep down I felt something was inherently wrong with me. I was flawed and faking. 

Flash forward to now: I have created space for my true feminine essence. I am more myself than I have ever been. On the way, I was required to take a mask off, and then another, and then another. 

I can now embody the feminine. She is with me, she is me. I let myself open. I allow myself pleasure without guilt or shame attached. I know that I am lovable because I exist and I don't usually get caught in proving myself. I feel spiritually wealthy, abundant.

The feminine art of receptivity and the ease that comes with it, is always available to you.

We all want more ease, grace, and pleasure. It's the natural receptive state that is so powerful for women (and men too). It's the essence the brings dreams to your door. It's the essence of b e i n g in the here and now. It allows you to inhabit your body more fully, and to restore vital energy that may have been lost early on in your life. 

All humans have feminine energy and the more we connect with both the masculine + feminine energies within us the more creative we can become as a channel for life. (I am speaking about this outside of gender or sexual orientation).

One of my favorite things to teach is that this balance of masculine and feminine energies (polarity) can be directly experienced within the musculature of the pelvis.

When I started practicing Yoni massage to release trapped energy, I discovered that my feminine side (the left) was weak, numb, and under functioning. My masculine side (the right) was tense with painful trigger points.

Through consistent self-care from both the Yoni massage and through my jade egg practice I have developed a beautiful awareness of my own needs that allows me to grow spiritually, cultivate creative energy, and enjoy my life more than I ever have before. 

What I discovered from my hyper-masculine tendencies:

  • two flexed masculine energies in bed doesn't make for ecstatic union, yin and yang matters.

  • magnetism is much more productive than 'making it happen' by force.

  • floating downstream with ease is always better than swimming up stream

  • women are worthy of attentiveness and pleasure in relationship too

  • there is no receiving without some sort of stillness and non-action

How to tap into your feminine essence:

  • surround yourself with the beauty you love

  • make ritual time to be still every month (I like to do this during ovulation and menstruation).

  • connect your womb to your heart through meditation or self-cultivation

  • try a self-guided Yoni massage to release trapped energy

  • start a jade egg practice and bring loving attention to your pelvis

I'd LOVE to learn from you: Leave a comment below and let us know...

  • What is your favorite way to tap into your feminine essence?

  • What makes you feel open and ready to receive?

  • What softens your heart and moves you from hyper activity to stillness and ease?

Big Love,

Jillian Xx


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If you want to:

+ Help your clients get better results

+ Free up time + energy to strategically create a group program

+ Stop hustling for your next single 1:1 session, or low-end sale

+ learn how to go high-end with your rates, effectively

Then, this is for you. Download it below for instant access.